BETTER THAN TEN SONS
I write this piece in celebration of one of the best creatures of divinity. The idea dropped in my heart today and I decided to trace the genesis of the title.
A lady was weeping because she was yet to have a child. She refused to eat and sadness became a close companion. Then her husband asked her a series of questions.
Then Elkanah her husband said to her, ‘Hannah, why do you weep? Why do you not eat? And why is your heart grieved? Am I not better to you than ten sons?’
I Samuel 1:8
I meditated on the phrase, BETTER THAN TEN SONS and saw its depth of meaning.
I once had a discussion with some ladies. One of them was married and so desperate to have a child. The others were single and yet to be ‘hooked.’ The married lady kept going on and on about the trauma of not having a child and said it was the WORST THING that could ever happen to a woman.
At that point, one of the single ladies stopped her.
‘The worst thing abi? At least you have a husband. And a loving on efor that matter. What of a lady who is single? Have you thought of her own trauma? You have options……You can adopt a child, try IVF, get a surrogate mother to have a child for you, become a foster mother to a child whose mother cannot take care of him or her. What options does the single lady have? Become a 2nd wife, hug a pillow, duvet or teddy bear when she craves for a man’s touch?’
The married woman became silent as she saw her own praise point.
I thought about it and remembered again the story of Hannah and Elkanah. Hannah was so blessed to have a man who is BETTER THAN TEN SONS. She became happy as soon as her husband reminded her of the fact.
Dear male reader of this piece, ‘Can your wife boldly say, ‘My husband is better than ten sons?’
I don’t mean USING THE VOICE OF INSTAGRAM which can impose reality on the fake.
I mean can she look into your eyes boldly, lovingly, without deceit and say those words?
If she can’t then you need to go back to the drawing board.
I heard Pastor Kingsley Okonkwo say he sometimes stays awake looking at his wife and saying, ‘Thank God I married this lady.’
I thought of the reverse and wondered how many women can sincerely say this about their husbands.
The woman who can has indeed married a man who is BETTER THAN TEN SONS.
A man is better than ten sons when he shields his wife from attacks from his family and anyone who wants to make her sad.
A man is better than ten sons when he makes his wife feel loved and appreciated.
A man who is better than ten sons will not raise his hand to hit his wife.
A man can be better than ten sons when his wife can sleep peacefully when he tells him he is travelling. Because she knows he is not travelling to another woman’s bed.
The man who is better than ten sons provides for his family.
The man better than ten sons remains committed to his wife through thick and thin. My father was married to my mum for more than four decades.
I have a dream.
That I will wake up every day, look into my husband’s eyes and say, ‘Sweetheart, you were worth waiting for.’
Are you a man who is better than ten sons?
You can be.
If you want to be.